"Alhamdulillah!"
Sometimes I don't know what else to say... Sometimes my heart is so filled of love for Allah, the deen, and my brothers and sisters that I do not know what else to say but "Alhamdulillah!" As I sit here now writing I am listening to the "Qur'an in Taraweeh." I am a bit overwhelmed by the beauty of the Qur'an, but why shouldn't I be as these are the words of Allah (SWT). If I wasn't writing I could watch the video feed and read the english subtitles, but just listening to the words is a spiritual experience.
I have been thinking about writing this blog post for some time. At times I think it is a good idea, then other times I wonder if I can convey into words how I am feeling, and if I can't, will readers just laugh? Well, I decided I don't care. It is my blog and in I will post my thoughts and if people don't care for it...well, there are countless other blogs to read.
What I have been feeling is a sense of calm, that finally I am at peace spiritually. It was a long road filled with many, many trials. None more trying than my own Islamophobia. Masha'llah, my heart was opened when I investigated and found the truth about Islam. But this is beyond my initial feelings about the deen, this is about the belief that everyone is born a Muslim. I truly understand that now. I feel that by reverting I am back in the religion I have been longing for all my life, the one I was born into.
But my thoughts go deeper than what I have been writing. I guess it is harder to convey that I thought. It is hard to express feelings of the heart when I hear a recitation of the Qur'an, or listening to nasheeds, or the feeling of brotherhood I have when praying with my brothers. It is an underlying contentment, an underlying self knowledge that this is my deen which has been in my subconscious all my life. The feeling of familiarity when I look at pictures of masjids, or pictures of the Ka'bah. I guess it is too hard to express into words.... Insha'Allah, maybe other brothers and sisters will understand and be able to help express the right words.
One thing is for certain, I will never say I am a 'convert' to Islam. I will proudly say I am a revert to the one true religion.
Allahu Akbar!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
As Salaamu 'alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatu. MashaAllah what a beautiful post. It was heartwarming! May Allah give you lots of Barakah and make you of the dwellers of Jannatul Firdaus and grant you the companionship of Rasulullah (Sallallahu 'alaihi wa Sallam). Ameen. wa Salaamu 'alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatu! Your sister in Islam.
Post a Comment